Questions on Male Sexual Thoughts, Activities, and Practices - Page 4

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(31g) Q:   I have strong urges to be nude in front of other people and to masturbate while others watch. I have done this before and even ended up having sex with multiple partners of both sexes while others watched. I get so excited when thinking about this, that sometimes I ejaculate without even touching myself. Is this abnormal?
491 A: (1) It sounds like you are interested in orgy style sex. Orgies consist of multiple sexual participants and sometimes they are of both sexes. Masturbation and sex can be involved as well as watching and/or active sexual participation. I'm not sure if I can put an approval label on it or call it "normal". However, there are other people who feel the way you do. (2) It is interesting that you can ejaculate without any touching. I can't say this is "abnormal", but it is unusual. In the past, I have heard this activity called "thinking off".

(32g) Q:   What should be the minimum and maximum time a man should spend with a girl while having sex?
492 A: Minimum time: 40 seconds (I think that's the record). -- Maximum time: 18 days (I think that's the record).
Actually, a man should discuss these sorts of things with the woman he is having sex with. Some women like it quick, but most women like it to take a little more time than it takes for the average male to ejaculate. While having sex, men comfortably average about five minutes (or less) before they orgasm, while women average about 15 minutes (or more) before they orgasm. Relationships are a tricky thing. They take a lot of work to come to reasonable compromises for both partners. Sexual relationships should take Time, Care, Communication, and Love (TCCL).

(33g) Q:   Recently I get an erection when I was hooking up with my girlfriend. When it is my turn to receive oral sex, my penis will not get erect for the life of me. She kisses me all over, but it will not become erect again. She then gives me a hand job and I get a weak erection and then I cum very quickly. What is wrong with me?
493 A: Honestly, I don't know for sure. But it could be anxiety, fear, worry, lack of interest, or something else. Be patient with yourself and see what happens. Try to relax enough so that you aren't thinking about it during sex. It will take time to feel comfortable. This is a common problem among men.

(34g) Q:   When I was at a party a couple of months ago, I slept with a girl I didn't even know, but I couldn't get an erection at all. The same thing happened at another party a month after and I couldn't get an erection either. Is this a sexual problem or is it normal to happen at the age of 20something?
494 A: (1) Many things can affect the ability to get an erection including anxiety, alcohol intake, nervousness, distractions, and more. (2) It's not a good idea to try to have sex with people you "don't know" or have sex at a "party".

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(35g) Q:   I read in a book that the HIV virus can go through a condom as easily as a baseball goes through a basket ball net. Do you agree with this?
495 A: (1) That can be a true statement if the condom is made of a natural product, such as sheep skin, because the surface of the condom is porous. The HIV virus is much smaller than a sperm cell. While natural condoms may protect from unwanted pregnancy, they are not as effective in preventing viral STDs such as HIV. However, a latex (synthetic) condom is not porous enough to let a virus pass through its surface, which makes it an effective prevention device for HIV/AIDS. There are many brand name latex condoms on the market. Unfortunately, some people are allergic to latex. (2) The first and best way to prevent the spread of  sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV, is to abstain from sex. The second best way to prevent sexually transmitted diseases is to abstain from multiple sexual partners. In my opinion, latex condoms come in third place on this list of prevention techniques.

(36g) Q:   Is it possible to get a STD while having anal sex? I don't have a STD neither does my partner.
496 A: (1) Anal intercourse will not cause a Sexually Transmitted Disease from the anal sex in and of itself. However, there are two problems with your question. It is never safe to say that you are 100% sure that your partner does not have an STD unless they have gone through a battery of medical tests to determine they are disease free. Secondly, you can never be 100% sure your "partner" has been or will be 100% faithful to you unless you know that they are entirely committed to the long-term relationship. Long-term relationships are measured in years (rather than days, weeks, or months) and they require the gradual building of trust over time. (2) I'm not sure the practice of "rimming" (oral-anal sex) is entirely safe. It's usually not a good idea to get fecal matter into the mouth, nose, eyes, etc.
NAME:   wondering
497 Q:   Can you get a sexually transmitted diseases from oral sex? If so, which ones and what are the symptoms?
A: Yes, it is slightly possible, and the symptoms would depend on the disease which disease you contract, which could be anything from Herpes to AIDS.

NAME:   (Anonymous)
498 Q: I was at a party last night and I was about to have sex with this girl but I couldn't get an erection. I tried everything. I did have a couple of drinks but I was nowhere close to being drunk. I am 16, so I would think that getting an erection would not be that hard. I do masterbate but like maybe once a day so I really don't think that caused it.
A: Thanks for your story. Maybe you need to be in love and develop long term relationships to perform decent sex. Too many people tend to overlook these realities at "parties". Nevertheless, if it is any consolation, I probably couldn't get an erection for her either.
499 Follow Up Q:   I don't think you understood my little story. I wrote the one about the 'party' and how I couldn't get an erection. I was asking why I didn't get the erection?
A: I think I fully understood the question. It didn't sound like you were in a long term relationship or even in love with "this girl". If the sex was casual sex, introduction sex (upon meeting), or a one night stand, it is understandable why you couldn't get an erection. Maybe your conscious is working to your advantage, even though you seem to think of this lack of erection as some sort of malfunction.

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