Survey - What do you think is the cause of sexual preference / orientation?
Do you think it is possible to change it?

The page below is an archive of old answers.
You can submit an answer to this survey on the Main Page - Cause of Sexual Preference

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SEXUALITY: Undecided
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Blu

I'm no narcissist, so that's really a hard question for me, but i'd have to use the Nature v. Nurture law of sexuality. This states to me that depending on how you are with your father, (if you're male)and your surrounding environment,it could influence your sex preference. But see I'm really not all that interested in guys yet in terms of friendships, or sex cuz I'm a little stoic,(appathetic, uniterested)in male sociality, but in contradiction to this law, I don't know if I need them cuz I find myself greatly atracted to females with out elder male persuassion (it scares me sometimes how much I WANT them!!!), and yeah, sometimes i'd like to ex-change jerk-off tips with another guy, and to tell, and show off some of my darker, or sexual ideals becuase I think as a guy I could share or talk about those 'nasty things'and he'd probably think it was cool, or whatever, but this is what causes a little ambivalence for me, so i'm staying undecided! I kinda like it too cuz I got that mystery thing goin'...who knows?...It's fun to play with sexuality;it's ALWAYS changing for me eing 16 and all!!

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Jeff

I hope you all listen to what I have to say with open eyes, ears and minds. ----- I started masturbating at a very young age and was exposed to pornography at an even younger age. When I was about 13 I started looking on the internet for pornography of girls that were my own age. As I grew up my lust for perversion grew as well. I started downloading all different types of pornography. I always felt wrong for masturbating since the first time I tried it and even more so when I would look at pornography that I knew was extremely perverted. Somehow, I knew it was wrong but I couldn't understand why. I also couldn't understand why I was so drawn to it. After a while I became desensitized to the perversion of it all.------- I grew up mainly with my mom and sister. We all had drug addictions and our house was never a stable place. I would stay in my room and do nothing but download pornography, do drugs, play video games and occasionally hang out with friends. Eventually I started skipping school and secluding myself from everybody in my life and only worried about how I was going to get my next "fix" be it drugs, porn, video games, etc. After a couple years of this I started to feel like I was different from everybody else but I couldn't explain why or how. This started to lead me into being extremely paranoid and I started to think everyone around me was thinking I was gay and I thought they would talk about me behind my back. Even though the only way I had to prove any of it way was my own thoughts. I lost touch with reality. It was as if someone or something was putting thoughts in my mind. I had lost complete control over myself and my mind. I started to accuse people for thinking I was gay. After I would have an episode of accusing and rambling on how I knew my friends/family were thinking I was gay they would assure me that they had never thought that of me as gay and didn't know why I would think that. My paranoiya got so bad I was no longer capable of being comfortable around anyone. After a while of being paranoid all day every day I came to the false conclusion that I must have been gay all along and was in denial. There was no other way I could explain why I was so paranoid about everyone around me. I just felt so alienated and had no other way, at the time, to explain my paranoid thoughts. I struggled back and forth with myself about whether or not I was gay. My paranoid thoughts about other people continued and grew worse everyday. My life went on like this for a while until one day I accepted God back into my life. Ever since that day my paranoid thoughts have gradually gotten better instead of gradually getting worse. Jesus Christ is my Lord and savior and I am here to tell you there is a battle going on in this world between good and evil. The Lord will lead you to victory over evil but you must have faith and believe in Him and his majesty. I pray you have learned from the story of my life and that it brings you closer to the Lord. God bless you all. May you find your way through Jesus Christ our savior.

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Jack

I think my preferences come from my early childhood. I was almost always surrounded by lots of women and only 2 men (my father and grandfather). I have always been prone to communicate better with women than with men and it somehow seems I understand them just a little better than I have ever understood myself. I have only 2 male friends and about 2 dozen female friends, and I have been in a stable relationship for 3 years. I think this has been caused by the factors I was exposed since my childhood (women, women, women). As for someone's preferences changing, I don't think that's how it goes. What can happen is that person's underlying preferences being exposed after they gain the trust that they can make it without being affected by society's judgement.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER:
TITLE: Frustrated

As I write this, my wife is down stairs bitching about any number of things she finds "wrong" in this house or that I have done. At one time, as young people, we had a hot sexual relationship. Over time, that has diminished to nothing. Not only because I would rather jerk off than try to seduce her, but because she just does not have any clue or concern as to what a good sexual relationship is. I have been heterosexual for 40 years of married life. As a teenager and young man, I experimented with other males somewhat. However, I am at the point where I would enjoy a non threatening sexual relationship with another male--because of my environment. I know that I have bisexual tendencies, but would be entirely hetereosexual with a hot female partner. Nevertheless, because of the environment I am in, if I could find a good buddy that I could suck with, I know I would be thrilled to take a large dick in my mouth and milk it dry. That is what happens when environment kicks in.

SEXUALITY: Gay
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Billy

I believe sexual orientation is mostly or entirely genetic. I think no one can change his or her orientation. There may be factors other than genes that contribute, though they would be so complex, I think untangling them would be a near impossibility. I reached puberty in the 50s when no one talked about homosexuality. I was gay then, and now realize I eroticized men and maleness even before. I had no idea what I was, having never heard of it. I even asked a friend what he fantasized about when he masturbated. He casually replied "girls." "Uh Oh", I thiught, "I am a different species!"

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: hot rod

I believe that your sexualality is predetermind and every one has some bi-sexual feelings, some people will experiment with bi-sexual urges and some won't or are affraid to explore their true feelings.

SEXUALITY: Homosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: This Guy

Its probably not genetic, hormonal, or pathalogical but rather just some amoral animal instinct pushing toward one gender or the other or both or neither based on needs that have nothing to do with Jesus, Freud, Mommy, or Daddy. That being said I think some people have had success becoming asexual or bisexual or perhaps even switching entirely in some cases when there's a good reason behind it and not just guilt or pressure.

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: BBW Chaser

Sexual orientation has nothing to do with genetics, as there are *many* identical twins in America where one is queer and the other not. I think it's a choice, even if a somewhat sub-conscious one. People seem to grow up gay when they've been abused as a child, from what I see. Personally, I was raised in a stable "mom and dad" home and grew up straight. Ellen Degenerate was abused as a child and grew up lez. See what I mean? Sexual attraction aside, I generally feel more comfortable with women as friends, and have quite a few female friends. I tend not to have as much patience with men, so my wife pointed out to me. I guess I'm a "Female Chauvenist".

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Tag

---- For me, it comes down to a conscious choice. I"ve always been creative and artistic, and the human form, male and female, can be the most beautiful creation ever. Because of my imagination running away from me as a child, and having the libido I have, I was never afraid to think about anything sexual about anybody. This caused some confusion as far as orientation was concerned through my teens and into my adult life, but what I learned is when it comes to sex and relationships, I can fall in love with a woman, imagine spending days upon days with her, growing with her, having someone at my side for the rest of my life and all that stuff. When my thoughts would turn to men, it was just about the physical. Not love, or commitment or loyalty, just sex. Basically, it was about my masturbationary fantasies about my own sex and looking for someone to be my mirror. I think that we all have things in common, as far as the mix goes, but different enviroments and circumstances affect different people differently. Sex is sex. Whatever we choose as individuals for ourselves doesn't change that. Since I believe that so much of what we do is a matter of choice, changing our orientation is also a matter of choice, to an extent. We cannot go through this life ignorant of the two sides of all that goes on in our heads and hearts.

SEXUALITY: In-Between
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Quiet

Dad left when I was very young. I like male attention, will melt with it, but I still keep a hold on reality. I guess my first contact, male, says it all.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Rick

Same that determines your behavior, how you were raised, where you were raised and parental acceptance

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER:
TITLE: Samuel

As a bisexual young man (feeling sexually attracted to both females and males) I know (thats right, "know" and don't "think") that nobody chooses to have an attraction to people of their own gender. I have no idea whether the cause for same-sex attraction is genetic, environmental or what...and I don't care and am not interested in what causes it; all I know is nobody chooses to have it. As a young child and as a teenager and even up until I was in my early 20s, I had difficulty accepting myself due to homosexual inclination and attraction...now I accept that it is part of who I am and that it is only a small part of who I am: as well as being bisexual, I am other things as well (I mean your sexuality does not affect your personality, your interests, how you live your life, what you do and what you take part in etc). Oh and by the way, I HATE effeminate gays and bisexuals...that is definately NOT natural. Although you cannot help being gay or bi, you CAN help putting on an effeminate "act" or "image" and there is no need for this; shuving it in other people's faces. Effeminate gays/bi people only make non-effeminate and "straight-acting" gays and bi people feel ashamed of being gay/bi. Most gays and bi people feel hatred and anger when they see "camp" or effeminate gay men who have created a horrible stereotype for them.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: nickknack

i do not think wae shoose our sexual orientation. i think that everyhting is predetermined. although homosexuality nad bi sexuality is a minorty, like "straight" or heterosexual people we do not choose. i also think that everyone or most people experiance in some way shaoe or form with both sexes. we are born to be curious. as far as people changing the sexual preferance. id ont think so. i thin that if you are gay you are gay, if you are straigh you are straight. i think that if you are bi-sexual you can favor one over the other, but you still would find yourself attracted to both. so no i do not think you choose your sexuality, and no i do not think you can change it.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: shortty 5 inches

Hi I'm 47 married and have finally decided to act on urges I've had all my life. A couple of years ago I was messing around on the internet, and came upon gay_____ chat room. After chatting in the room I oticed there were several other married man in the room. I was very surprised. Well after some time I did meet a guy (married also). It was the most exciting sex I've had in years. It was like the first time I got laid by a chick. We showered, masturbated, and 69. It's very har to have a bi relationship while being married. Wish I had a steady J/O buddy. If you are wondering....The wife and I don't have sex....often.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER:
TITLE: shorty

Frustrated. I know exactly where you are at. The wife and I have not had sex in a year (I'm MWM 47). I had a few incounters with men this past year, it realy turns me feeling another man penis in my hand and or mouth. Wher you live maybe we could meet. I know it's a long shot. By the way my wif is down stairs painting living room B_____thing at me too. Good luck

SEXUALITY: Gay
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Hayden

I knew I was gay at the age of 12 or 13 boys and men would get me very aroused, My brothers were involved in manly sports like football & hockey. I like baseball, ran track, liked the theater,and other cultural things I was different than them. I'm still in the closet with my friends & family but I'm 100% gay.

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: gibber

I think its predetermined. I used to wonder if i was gay when I would jerk off with my buddies. But we realized it was a part of growing up and there wasn't any "feeling" there. I also believe that there are a lot of people who do not consider themself gay that enjoy sex and the thought of the naked human body. I am not gay, but I know what it is like to jack off or have a hard on so when I see it, it turns me on. I say this because even if a person did change their preference if they could, most people would still find some attraction to both sexes.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: jeff

I believe that everyone is bisexual, but that most do not act on it because of social taboos. As much as the Gay Lib movement has made strides in this country, it is still a stigma for males to admit there attraction for another man.

SEXUALITY: Straight
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Don

My preference is women, and I have no idea why that preference exixts. Masturbation has been a major part of my sex life, including group masturbation as a teen ager. I think each person sexual preference probably is is chosen differently. I do not think the preference can be changed, however a person's desire may change, I think by the opening of the mind. I recently sucked a cock for the first time and found it wildly erotic. For years I have gone to Gay baths, and masturbated for anyone wishing to watch, but had avoided any reciprocal touching, until rently. I do not think my sexuality has changed, females are clearly the preference, but sucking cocks has become almost an obsession.

SEXUALITY: Straight
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Casey

I was raised in a mostly all male environment. We owned a large cattle ranch and employed 20 to 40 cowboys at differednt times throughout the year. A new group every year, and when 13 yrs and up, I would ask the guys about sex and we would eventually mutually masturbate each other one on one. For years, I had it made as far as cock was concerned and I loved every minute of it. However at 16, I discovered girls and couldn't get enough of them. But, it was a lot easier for me to have plenty of orgasms with guys than gals. I got married and had kids, but I still love cock.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Easy

----I grew up with a father that was abusive to my mom. Therefore, I grew up very insecure and timid. I found that sucking my cousin was very conforting because he was agressive. When I was like 16, a doctor examining me took me from behind and I felt his erect penis over my shorts. I found it very weird but erotic and shameful because of these feelings. I, nevertheless, masturbated thinking about it often. Once I tried to take my cousin's large penis through my ass... but just the brief initial opening of my hole huurt.--When my cousin and I were like 20, he often got an erection and I wanted it. He finally took me under a bridge and took out his very large dick, but I backed down although I really wanted to. Later that night I went to pick him up and took him to the lake and I confessed my feelings and showed him my short dick. He tried to tell me it was not so short to make me feel better. He did show me a place where there was a glory hole. I frequently went there to get my dick s.... I found all kinds of large dicks but refused to suck. Most of these guys ended up giving me a blow job. I never sucked or got f---after that.--- I married and had children. I tried to keep away, but I always managed to get s--. ----In my late fifties I got drunk and ended up blowing a boyfriend of my daughters. He has allowed me to fondled his ass and has bj me once. Guess why? Although he is very tall, he has a short fat dick. --How does one develop our orientation? Take an abusive father, a less than average penis, mix it with the right circumstances and your left in the middle leaning from one side and the other. Get old and you lean towards the other side.

SEXUALITY: Gay
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Paul

It took me a long, long time to even realize that I had a sexual orientation. I had a normal childhood. There is nothing I remember that related to any sexual experiences or even being molested. But as early as I can remember, I was fascinated by good looking older boys. I loved to look at them. It was only their faces that I was attracted to. I never remember wanting to see them undressed until after I went through puberty. And then I was only interested to see if they had pubic hair like I did. I had no sexual attraction to them that I remember. When I was in mid high school, I first heard the word "queer." We were riding around after youth church services one Sunday night when my friends referred to someone who had just graduated from college as being a queer. I was far too innocent to even ask what they were talking about, but I soon understood and I started to wonder if I might also be queer. My attraction to other boys was becoming much stronger, but I only wanted to look at their bodies. I had no idea if, how, or why two men would have sex. Because I was not attracted to females in the least, I started praying each night for God to let me get married and have children. I so much wanted to have a family. But my prayers were in vain, which led me to abandon my religious upbringing. I have never been attracted to a female. My attractions are only to males. But I have never had a sexual encounter with one. The first erect male penis I ever saw was on a VHS tape of straight porn in my mid '40s. Since I became internet active, I have seen more gay sex than I care to think about. I envy those who are not as closeted as I and have had their sexual fantasies fulfilled with a live partner. However, I have no regrets. I don't think that any sexual encounter could ever replace the rush that I get when I look at the body of a young beautiful man.

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: WOOK

I HAVE NEVER MET A TRULY GAY MAN. I HAVE MET MEN WHO ENGAGED IN HOMOSEXUAL ACTIVITY DUE TO THE EASE OF GAINING ACCESS TO THE LIFESTYLE OR FOR OTHER REASONS. I BELIEVE THAT THERE ARE MEN THAT ARE MORE FEMININE THAT OTHERS JUST AS THERE ARE WOMEN WHO ARE MORE MASCULINE THAN OTHERS.

SEXUALITY: In-Between
GENDER: Male
TITLE: plowboy

I guess I like to give another male pleasure by giving the best blow job they have ver had. I like to feel there cock pumping haed in my mouth and tast of sperm. I also enjoy giving the first BJ to a young man and the reaction of there ejaculation and the shear pleasure they get.

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: XYZ

I think sexual preference is 80% brain-wiring and 20% experience. I think it is possible for a person to learn to appreciate another sexual preference, but not change it entirely. And I think that forcing people to be something the brain-wiring says they are not is a sure way of driving someone insane. I'm sure a lot of serial killers were gay people forced to be straight by well-meaning parents, or straights who had really bad awful gay experiences.

SEXUALITY: Gay
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Davey

First, I don't use the term 'preference' as it implies choice. I can speak only for myself, but I feel that my sexual orientation is innate...there from birth. And my gut feeling is that everyone else's orientation is likewise something they're born with. I don't believe we can alter our own or another's orientation.

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: nondescript

The whole nature versus nurture question is loaded, because it is really both. First, I don't think it really matters if homosexuality is genetic or learned. That doesn't make it any better or worse. I also don't think that homosexuality is necessarily black and white, have it or don't have it. All people can be turned on by the same sex to some extent. I think that some fear that because of religious and social reasons. I do think that some are homosexual because it is "cool" to be so. That's probably a minority, though. I do think that a person can change preference over time, just as someone can change favorite foods. I have also seen studies that show that overpopulation can increase homosexuality in rat populations. That's probably true in this one, too. Am I genetically bent towards having a favorite food? Maybe. It doesn't really matter to me, though. I know what I like and don't like. The same is true of sexual preference.

SEXUALITY: In-Between
GENDER: Male
TITLE: PENIS MILKER

........All of my life I have been haunted by an unrelenting urge to be breast fed. It probably never happened when I was young. Now I am older and so unattractive that such a thing will surely never happen. So I have turned inward with my sexuality and developed an intense desire to suck what appeares to be an even more of a nipple than the ones that women have. The penis is more of a nipple than the female is. Though I'm too old, I wish that I could suckle the milk from my own penis.I suppose I will have to find another penis to do the job. This is what determined my sexuality. This is what my sexuality has morphed into in time. It is of interest that one's sexuality is not static but migrates in time to places never thought of. It could have of benefit to learn of this long ago. And then again, maybe not. The penis and it's milk are where I am now and will probably stay.

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER:
TITLE: Alvin

I consider myself totally heterosexual.I think that you are born one way or the other. Having said that, I have been "guilty" of directing my penis towards my mouth at the moment of orgasm. Usually I am excited by the fact that I am about to injest my own semen, but at the moment of ejaculation as I experience the thick semen enter my mouth, I am a bit grossed out. If you truly enjoy sucking cock or pussy ... then enjoy it

SEXUALITY: Monosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: LONER

I am very unattractive, and not so young anymore. So there are few if any options for me. My sexuality has turned inward to the only place left for it to go...my penis. Even my fantasies are limited exclusively to my penis. A world in which I have always been shunned, is no longer implicated in my sexual thoughts. It is freedom this way, and there is none of the pain of rejection. So I have been reading these surveys to determine if there are some aspects of my penis play that might be made more intensive. So this is what has caused my current sexual preference. It may not be the best, but will have to do. Is there anyone on earth who is sexually inert?

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Pat

I think that sexual orientation is set by influences in your life and that you get it at a young age. You can't really change it becuase one of those annoying habbits really. I know that I was straight up intill the age of 8 when I had a sexual experience with another guy who was exploring his body and his genitals. I know from that day on that I have had majorly strong feelings for men and as sick as it was, because he was a cousin, for relatives aswell. I think had that experience not happened when I was 8, and happened when I was older enough to understand the circumstances of what happened, I wouldn't be bisexual or even gay because I don't really get much turned on by women anymore. So I think that if you have a certain experience when you are young, like at my age of 8, that it will be the cause of your choice in sexual orientation. I do also believe it good by inherited or by D.N.A but I think that if you have those sort of experiences, it will forever change you. It's the same with bad habbits you may have. I know at a young age I saw my parents dye there hair tons so now at the age of 14 all I want to do is dye my hair over and over again so really its that young age where things have an influence that will really change your life and your sexual orientation.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Female
TITLE: Ineedsomehelp!

Can someone change their own sexual orientation or someone else's? I don't see an answer to this anywhere here. I am a married female, bored after 15 years of living with a sexualy selfish male. I have been bi in the past. The only way I hadan orgasm until recently was by masturbation, fantasizing about women. I recently met a gay male and fell head over heels, he claims he's never had sex with a woman. Now, to reach orgasm I fantasize almost exclusively about male homosexual sex! How screwed up is that? After reading stuff on here about male sex, I really don't think sex would be that good between us, even if it happened. Or maybe it could? I wish I could get in touch with someone who has been in the same (no pun intended) position as me. My feelings have gone from lust to more like love, I really just want to have sex with him to show him I care and to make him happy. He's got not partner and hasn't had for a long time. He's been hurt and abused in past relationships and his family especially his mother are all messed up. Can someone answer me? Would he find sex with a woman disgusting, as someone suggested?

SEXUALITY: Other
GENDER: Other
TITLE: hello

it's very complicated for me and yet very simple. great thing about people is each are individuals with their own personalities beliefs or lack of belief and its great to see how diverse the voices are here. i wish there were no labels and yet somehow communication... it's weird how everything has a connotation/denonotation i wish things could just--like we could all make up a name for ourselves and orientation and stuff that more fully expresses the creation we are.

SEXUALITY: In-Between
GENDER: Male
TITLE: princessdye

My sexual preferance seems to change depending on certain moods which i feel are out of my control. I love women. I definatly feel they are the most beautiful and confusing creatures on the earth and I could never receive the full bodied pleasure I desire, with a man or a woman alone. My homoerotic feelings come from childhood fights in which I lost. Legitamatley lost fights. I find that I am turned on by being over powered completely against my control by another man, and forced to do the most nasty things I can imagine. I am deeply turned on by these fantasies and ready to forget about it at the same time. Desperatley want to be feminized!!!!! I promise That I wont let you down if you just ledt my girlfrien and friends go.

SEXUALITY: Straight
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Rutjep

Uppbringing causes my sexual preferences. If I had been brought up by homosexuals I would have become one. I believe sexual preferences are caused by uppbringing and morals. The sexual preferences can be changed by environment or another person. A straight guy can be persuaded to try anything, just out of curiosity.

SEXUALITY: Straight
GENDER: Male
TITLE: NYLON JACKET FREAK

IM HAVE A FETISH WITH NYLON WINDBREAKERS AND NYLON PANTS. ILOVE TO JACK OFF IN THEM AND STAIN THEM. IM CURRENTLY WEARING A RED, NAVY BLUE ADDIDAS NYLON TRACKSUIT (WITH NO LINING AND NOTHING ON UNDERNEITH) THIS NYLON SUIT HAS SEVERAL STAINS! IS THERE ANYONE OUT THERE WITH THE SAME FETISH?

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Christopher

I believe I'm heterosexual. I'm 24 years old and have been sexually interested in women all my life, minus a few intreguing thoughts about boys during my pre-teens. I bought some pictures of naked ladies from friends in middle school, and found the experience so mind-shockingly pleasurable that I've stuck with it. Since then I've indulged myself in pornography, 1-900 hot lines, and fantasies about women to get my sexual release. Thoughts of gay men have always been wierd to me. I grew up in San Francisco with a lot of gay men around, and it was always a taboo subject and was something I wasnt too interested in. I would fantasize about women who lived next door, girls in school, and girls who I worked with or who were in volunteer groups I was in. It was great, and going to college only made these thoughts and possibilities even more real to me. I've always been shy and never had a girlfriend through college, but made friends with girls easily and always wished I could develop the friendships into something more. Over these years my sex drive was powerful, and I felt embarrased to indulge in it for fear I'd ruin friendships and such. I've also had guilt about using women for sex because (i believe) my parents put such emphasis on the horrendous aspects of sex, including rapes, incest, usery, etc. In the past two years my brother came out and claimed he was gay, and that put a depressive damper on my impression of him. I dunno why (though i believe its understandable), but it really effected me. I've always been a little homophobic, though have always stood up for gay men and have felt they need the respect and rights everyone deserves. However, despite these views it still has always creeped me out to think about a guy having lustful thoughts about me. Since then I've gone into a bit of a depression stemming from other problems in my life and have felt a distinct loss in sexual desire recently as well. Whenever I see sexually attractive women I feel less and less drive towards them, but when I masturbate or get sexually aroused, the response and fantasies that satisfy me are solely those that include women. I've had times where images of men (some who I cannot deny are attractive, though not sexually) have crossed my mind while I was masturbating, and it has really killed the mood. Am I in denial? There may be some things I have yet to figure out, but overall I dont think I'm in denial, as there is a real aversion to these thoughts that makes me almost physically ill and I've been exceptionally attracted to women for too long to have this relatively sudden change be anything healthy. I believe it has something to do with my depression, which cropped up during my senior year of college and has included a complete lack of desire and motivation to further myself in life (grad school, jobs, recreation and trips, etc). It still stands that thoughts of women are what solely satisfy my sexual urges, but its real tough to see an attractive man without being reminded of my reduced sex drive and end up being creeped out.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: mar-ru

my thoery is simple the first half is genetic a cemical thing; the second half is nothing but choice the body reacts to the touch of ethier gender to a degree so it is only a matter of who you choose to be, consider a lot of people that have choose to be straight have experimented with some one of the same gender and enjoyed it.

SEXUALITY: Straight
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Tim

You can chose what you want if it men girls or animals. It depends on what your into when your a kid. If you look at gay porn when your about five and then you do more when your 10 youll be gay but realy its just what you see and whats around you, if you want to change what you are you can just go to bi then go to whatever you wanna be, straight or gay.

SEXUALITY: Gay
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Bobby

When much younger a older guy had been helping him clean out his garage. He had a old car in there and wanted to know if I wanted to get in it. Well I did. Sitting in the front seat I hand my hands on the steering wheel pretending to be driving. At that time he had but his hand on my crotch and started rubbing there. He had pulled my shorts and undwear just enough for my penis to be exposed. Then he started to suck on it. Ever since that experinces cars have always has been my most favorite place to have sex.

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Shelf stacker

I am a mans man. I eat too many pies and cakes and I drink too much ale. I am fat and ugly and I KNOW IT. But I still have a hot girlfriend and I like jacking off to pictures of her. I also love porn and pictures of women like Jessica Alba. I prefer wanking over young women. Old women my age are fucken ugly!!

SEXUALITY: Undecided
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Confused

This is a difficult question to answer. I am married with children, our sex life is not all that good, actually I would say it is horrible. I love blow jobs and I love doing my wife doggie style, howeverwe can go days, months, and even years without any affection. She's more like a roommate than anything else. When I'm laying in bed or taking a shower, I love to masterbate, I love playing with my crack. And I think about sucking someone dicks. I can watch gay porn and actually get aroused. Am I srewd up in the head? denying what I probably am? Will I ever take the plunge? Not sure. I mean, sometimes I think about walking up to a guy and asking if I could suck him off. It sounds crazy I know. But I'd hate to destroy my marriage and my kids.

SEXUALITY: Homosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: David R.

I feel that this particular question always goes with the adage nature vs. nurture. Some folks believe that something "happened" to make an individual bi-sexual or gay. I have always been gay. I can remember my first attraction to a male was at about 4 years old. I was visiting my grandmothers, and the neighbors son was there, he was a teen, however, I really do not know how old. I remeber being so attracted to him, all i wanted was for him to hold me in his arms. He would pick me up and hug me. I can remember feeling so secure in his arms.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Drew

I was raised to believe that sexuality or sexual preference is a choice. However, I know that I was attracted to other males even before I turned 7. In fact, I had a very strong attraction to guys long before I even dated girls. But, other than experimentation, sex with other guys was hard to come by, and sex with girls was more available.----I didn't start dating girls until a college-aged chaperone suggested a date with a few of the girls at our church. So, I started dating girls, even though I was have sex with guys at the gym, at the beach, or in the park.----Well, I broke off a relationship with a very nice guy in order to get married, which was in keeping with my religious upbringing. Although I loved my wife, I continued to have sex with other buys, including two relationships, throughout our marriage. I told my wife about my sexual escapades after being married for two years, and she decided to stick it out with me even though she was horrified. She even stuck with me through two arrests--sex in the park--and we remained married for more than 25 years.----To bring this to a close, I moved in with another guy while working away from home for an extended period, which brought an end to my marriage. I wish I hadn't caused her so much grief, but the attraction to other guys was and is more than I can resist. In other words, as much as I tried on my own and with professional couselors, I could not decide to be happily straight.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER:
TITLE: BiMarriedGuy

When I was a very young boy I somehow new that I was attracted to both sexes. I saw girl's as soft and sweet, and boy's as strong and even better looking than girl's. In my teen year's I was attracted more to boy's. I knew that I was diferent than most. I knew what I wanted in life and I knew how I could and eventually would get what I wanted.----I believe that we are all predisposed to being what we are sexually, I don't believe one can change what they really are.----I believe that eventually science will brove that one's sexuality is a matter of genetics, and one day what ever it is that causes a male to be a homosexual or a female a lesbian scientist's will be able to determine this genetic flaw (and I don't like calling it that) prior to birth.---- I really don't think that anyone would choose to be Gay because it really is not a great life.---- Maybe one day we will all be able to co-exist and simply learn to love each other regardless of our sexual orientation.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Juicy B

My preference was caused when me and my best friend use to mess around. We use to go n da woods and jack off. Then we started to suck each otha off. We never did it cuz he moved away, but i found me a new buddi and he like to ride my dick wit his clothes on. So we'll c were that go!!!

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: seeker25801

My sexual preference was caused purely by curiosity. I was curious about sex at a very, very young age. I read about all types of sexual activities at a very young age. The more someone told me a certain sexual practice or preference was wrong, the more I wanted to find out about why it was so wrong. After meeting a young lady who was as curious as I was we started exploring a wide variety of activities; everything from sex in crowded, public places like in the water at Myrtle Beach, NC and the crowded hotel pool to bisexuality. We discovered what we liked and didn't like and thus, my sexual preferences were discovered. If anyone asked my advice I would tell them this: Don't knock it until you try it. If you're curious about pain, start slow and see how much pain you like. If you're curious about anal sex, start alone with sex toys or your fingers. And above all...to find out if something sexual turns you on, watch pornography. If you like watching it, chances are you'll really like doing it.

SEXUALITY: Straight
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Moustache Rhyde

wow ive been filling out these survays for the last hour and this is the first one i have no idea how to answer.i think i saw a tv special that said it was somthing in the brain developement but i could be mistaken

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: keneth

what can i say! this is my belief that i came up with, im only 21yrs old. it's not a choice because that would mean "straight" people had a choice to be gay, but decided to be "straight" b/c that's the way they were brought up? makes no sense right? can't be environment b/c no matter how much you tell your kid not to do something, they'll still do it if they really want to, what i'm saying is that a man can have lots of sex with women but if i doesnt like it and doesnt feel right to him b/c he's thinkin of a man, he's gay! if a gay man has sex with a women, and he's capable of havin an erection and havin an aorgasm does that make him straight? hell no! i believe my sexual feelings as well as every other human being cannot simply be describe in only one word! plus i think we read into sexual expierences way to much tons of kids have been molested by the same sex and still had a marriage and kids, others didn't. i think it has to be genetics! whatever who cares just live and let live! i always loved girls since i can remember, got into limited same sex action in my late teens. i love both sexes but i see myself with a woman and having kids, not with a guy! i think i only enjoy having a guy give oral sex to me a lot b/c it makes me feel strong, that i got a man , the subject of strength in society, to go down on me makes me feel like i got power! weird or what

SEXUALITY: In-Between
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Bud

Sexual preferences are determined on life situations and choices No One can change their own sexual preferences but not someone eleses

SEXUALITY: Gay
GENDER: Male
TITLE: JJ

Sexual orientation is likely determined when the fetus is in utero, possibily caused by a flux of more male hormones then in a heterosexual child. The research suggests that sexual orientation has a strong biological component. Studies on the brains of gay men determined that an area of the hypothalmus of the brain is smaller than in heterosexual men. Research also points towards a genetic link, as in the case of identical twins. If one twin is gay, there is a 50% more likely chance that the other one is gay too. There have also been stidues done on phermones and body odor, and both gay men and lesbian women produce difference odors than heterosexual men and women. Seuxal orientation can not easily be changed, if at all. Movements by religous conservatives such as Exodus...which believe that homosexualiy is a sinful lifesttyle choice, have tried to "cure" homosexuality though prayer. Other movements try to be more scientific, such as "reparative therapy", though most credible scientists would look at it as pseudoscientific as these so called therapists believe that homosexuality is casued by poor parenting. Reparative therapists have nevet been published in a credible peer review journal. On the contrary, studies on gay and lesbian people have showed that gay people come from all sorts of families...good and bad....and there is no link between sexual orientation and parenting. Though some indiiduals from conservative religious backgrounds claim they have been cured and are now "ex gays", there is a growing number of people who are "ex ex gays", who finally accepted themseles for who they are. In many traditional African and Native American cultures, gay and lesbian people were respected for being different. They were often the shamens, and the wise men and wise women of the village. They were believed to have special powers of insight and a closer connection to the spirit world then were straight people. Today, liberal and intellectual churches do not believe that homosexuality is a sinful lifestyle choice. Instead, they welcome all people from all walks of life. The bibical passages that conservative chuches state are anti homosexuality are mistranslated and taken out of context from their historical context. For example , the story of Soddom and Gomorrah is widely thought to be a warning againt gay people. But if read more closely, the sin of Sodom was not homosexuality, but inhospitiality. Loving another person is not a sin. Judging another person and being cruel to them because they were born differently is. In the Chrisitan community, the United Church of Christ has become the first church to stand up in support of equal rights for gay and lesbian people. Other churches are starting to lean left....such as parts of the Episcople church, the Presbyterian church of America, the United Methodist Church, and even some selected Roman Catholic Churches have come out in support of gay people. The Unitarian Universalist Church does not identify as Christian, but has always accepted the spirituality of gay and lesbian people. It is estimated that about 10% of the population is gay. Those people are your newscasters, your teachers, your religious leaders, police officers...they are found in everywalk of life. Its okay to be gay. Not only is it okay, but its wonderful to be different than most of society. To those who say "I was saved from homosexuality from the Lord Jesus Christ". Umm...there is nothing to be saved from. God made you perfect as you are. Loving another person is not a sin. Learn your religion and theology, but don't believe what has been traditionally taught to you by anti-intellectual and conservative religous leaders. Get to know gay and lesbian people and become friends with them. Someday gay people will have equal rights. Someday, we shall overcome. Peace JJ

SEXUALITY: Homosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Harry

I don't wonder what causes my sexual preference. I just enjoy it.

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: interested

I think my sexual preferences were caused by circumstances. When my sex life first started at age 12 it was with friends, mutual masturbation with most, oral and anal with two boys. I was rejected by a couple of girls, which made me very shy for a long time. After I moved out of the small town where I lived my sex life was mainly solo for a long time; I had only two homoxexual experiences and petting sessions with a couple of girls, which led to mutual masturbation. But these relationships never continued. During those years I had quite a few male friends but no sex with them. My sex life consisted of masturbating a few times a week. I was able to suck my own penis and did that a couple of times a week. At 29 I married, and my wife and I have had varying amounts of sex through the years, mainly oral and intercourse. She encouraged me to masturbate as much as I wanted, and I found that the more I did it the more I liked it. Now I masturbate almost all my private time as well as have sex with my wife, I never seem to lose my feeling for sex. I think my sex life easily could have been different. If not for the early rejection by a couple of girls, I don't doubt I could have become promiscuous. I am not sure I could have become homosexual. Actually I enjoyed sucking another man's penis and wouldn't mind doing it even now, but I don't care for any other homosexual practices or the gay lifestyle.--I don't think you could change anyone's sexual orientation. Why would anyone want to? Live and let live. What does it matter if someone gets their satisfaction from vaginal intercourse, anal intercourse, masturbating, sucking a penis or a pussy, or anything else. The only thing I would draw the line at is doing something your partner doesn't enjoy or that is hurtful to others.-----When I was about 40 I had a choice to find a discreet sex partner or masturbate as much as I wanted, and I chose masturbation. Probably I missed something by not having sex with more other people, but I am happy enough being a masturbator.----I have no doubt that everyone's sexual preferences are caused by different things, but probably mostly by childhood experiences and circumstances.----When I was 11 I went swimming with a friend, and he brought along a bar of soap of a certain kind to wash. After, being a year older, he showed me how to masturbate. He had a huge penis! For years after, the smell of that soap would give me an erection! So I think any kind of sexual experience in early childhood could have some sort of effect of their sexuality.

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Ken

I don't think sexual preference can be chosen at all. I think it's innate. I could no more make myself gay than I could grow a second head out of my shoulder. So, nothing "causes" sexual preference. I think some things might influence areas of one's sexuality like what turns you on, but the core preference is inside you forever.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: jonno

experience at school. not sure yes i think so. i can normally seduce staight guys. i think all guys have a bisexual inclination.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Dickie

I think in my case it feels like a choice because I am attracted to both sexes, but for very different reasons. My first sexual experiences were with other little boys. In fact I was _____ by a sixth grader in the park when I was in third grade. I remember it as being wonderful. I also started fooling around with an adolescent cousin my age who would _____ me whenever our families got together. That lasted until our brothers told on us. I then went along with dating girls as I became older and never turned to males through high school or college and eventually married my sweetheart. She left me after five years due to my premature ejaculation problem. -------- I had several long term relationshops over the years that were a lot of work. After being in an abusive situation with a pyscho-bitch for six years, I decided at age 48 that I would take a look at the male sex option. I joined a supportive bisexual group and several gay sports clubs like skiing and scuba diving. I was so impressed how nice these people were and the lack of competition that heteros seem to covet, I jumped in happily with both feet. I now had full access to all the sex I wanted, and it was really hot. I loved it and soon had a cute bisexual girlfriend and three male lovers. We did three ways and parties that were way better than anything I had ever known before. I attended Bi discussion groups where we all could talk about our sexual feelings and desires. I was hooked and never felt confused about my identity. I was a fully functioning human being, a sexual explorer, embracing the lifestyle and enjoying so many paths to pleasure. -------- I came to enjoy anal sex and had the best orgasms when a guy's ____ was deep in my ____ and his arms were holding me tight and he was jacking my ____. I still enjoy women and would like to have another girlfriend who understands my needs, but for now and the last four years I have been exclusively gay, or if you will, a man who enjoys what men do for me. Especially having my anus kissed and tongued as foreplay, something I have not found with my female partners. ----- I am sure there are many reasons why people have their sexual preferences. Their religious background has to be a factor due the sin thing, and of course societal stigma with anything out of the norm. Those folks lucky or smart enough to look deep inside their pysche and would give themselves permission to explore their desires without fear are rewarded with increased happiness and self confidence. They are being true to themselves. There are pitfalls and risks, but nothing worth having is without them. The route to changing yourself is inside, and you alone can do the work. You really can't change other people. They have to want it on their own for themselves. Celebrate what you can do and model it for others to see. That's about all you can do. Enjoy.

SEXUALITY: Undecided
GENDER: Male
TITLE: ???

I really need you to answer this for me. I am a 13 year old male who is madly in love with the women species, but when I masterbate, I end up thinking about other men. I also end up in the middle of something, just thinking to my self "if I was gay, who would I think I would want to go out with." I am also afraid that if I am homosexual or bisexual, I will face torment, tessing, and most of all, rejection from my family. Based on this information, do you think I am gay/bi? Or am I just going through a normal stage in my life. If you could really answer this as soon as possible. Thanks in advance.

SEXUALITY: Gay
GENDER: Male
TITLE: matt

When I was really young, my Dad used to work from moning to evening, but I would still see him and talk to him. However, my Mum did all of the discipline. I don't think that that is why I'm gay as my twin brother is not. I think it is all genetic. I also don't think that you can change your sexual orientation - however, you can be 'in the closet'. I also get annoyed when you read in the newspapers that teaching young children same sex parents families will braiwash them to be gay - the writer doesn't know what makes someone gay, you can brainwash them! It is quite an offence to us gays!

SEXUALITY: Metrosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Daniel

This is just like the same age old question nature vs nuture, you want an answer to this go to psychology sources. Really there's no true answer to this. In my opinion however, it's both. Some children are born with both sexes and parents are faced with a decision that'll decide their child's sexual orientation for the rest of their lives. Then however, there are some who are raised in a gay household, or a straight household and it determines how they view the opposite or same sex. There's so much material on this subject I can't began to start explaining it all fully in detail. Google it, or AskJeeves, who knows you might find some pretty interesting stuff out.

SEXUALITY: Straight
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Robby

I was raped by a senior in my school and then the rest of the football team well I guess I had to like it because I still like it in my butt and sometimes like to suck them.I was 13 when this happend

SEXUALITY: In-Between
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Sean

I think your experiance, past, life, what your comfortable with, your surroundings, having a mother and not father, vice versa. Being abused... etc. I dont believe that its genetics. Everything is genetics by doctors these days just so that they can say you have this and you have to take a drug. Cancer is not genetic. Its the way we choose to eat and live our lifes that causes the damage. Its all life and experiance and growing up, your surroundings etc. Ofcourse this is my opinion but no one obviously chooses to be gay or bi. Straight is the norm. You dont see straight people talking about being straight and choosing it. Its only those who obviously are out of the norm. Those who are gay say it was genetic to explain why they are the way they are and may not be happy with it and want people to think that they didnt choose to be that way, that god or birth chose it. I dont know but I dont believe it. ----- I hate labels. I am very uncomfortable with labels and I hate the way society is handling it. They are easing up a bit though with the way men dress and certain issues etc. If society was open with sexuality. Im sure there would be alot less gays and bi's. Im not saying be gay or bi is bad. Just because I feel that because of society alot of men and women put themselves in holes and feel that they need to label themselves based on there actions. When you really cant define sexuality. Everyone goes through different things, the outcome of everyones sexuality is different. Everyone has phases and things that happen. Everyone likes different things. And some who label themselves subcontiously keep themselves from growing and exploring there feelings and hearts to grow for others. Sexuality doesnt make people who they are, sexuality is apart of everyone. I myself find guys sexually attractive. But I truly do not want to be with a guy. I dont want to be with a guy romanticly or inntimitly or have that kind of relationship. Girls I find attractive just not sexually attractive but I havent done anything with a girl yet so Im not entirly sure yet but I do know that I want to be with a girl, have a romantic, and intimet relationship with one. Girls are very open about doing things with girls and even fine with commenting how hott other girls are etc. Older men (Straight if you will ) I find make comments about guys being good looking or hott because they dont care and are comfortable with whatever. I think for everyone, we all find both sexes attractive but we also have likes and dislikes and some are more aware and observant and more dominant etc. Its not genetics. Sexuality shouldnt be labled, its more complicated than that. Hopefully one day everyone will be open about it and everyone will be okay with doing whatever, having fun and not feeling bad about it etc. Like I said everyones different. I dont want to label myself and if I had to, I think the Kinsey scale says it all. I would have to say that Im not gay or bi but Im not completly straight either. I just dont know and its fustrating because I feel I have to label myself something. They definitly need to come up with more labels...lol So I dont know where that falls in society but I feel society has made it harder for me to except what i have done in the past and the feelings I have now and it sucks. I just have to be comfortable and eccept my feelings, and let my feelings, myself and my surroundings grow with them.

SEXUALITY: Straight
GENDER:
TITLE: Olaphamae

I don't think that hanging around alot of women as a young child can make you gay or vice versa . I think it is all gentic and it can't be changed no matter how hard you try there are tons of homosexuals who want to do the right thing and become strait they cause it genetic. Things like cancer are gentic people with cancer want to change but that cant because its genetic same thing with gays/or lesbians.

SEXUALITY: Bisexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Sherman Tank

I'm attracted to women, and although I don't find men attractive, I am attracted to one particular male body part. I don't know why - I've always thought of it as a choice, but I know that's false. Genetics? Maybe, I'll leave that to the experts. We're probably all attracted to both male and female, but our conditioned brains put up mental blocks to make us think otherwise.

SEXUALITY: Undecided
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Matt

I think that you are sort of born with your sexual preferance. I think that people can actually change their preferance if they really try, but it is unhealthy.

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: GunshySlycat1

What do you think causes your sexual preference? I'm straight. It's because that's the way I was meant to be. Is everyone's sexual preference caused by the same thing(s)? Can be, but not always. Can someone change their own sexual orientation or someone else's? No. Only to experiement, but you can't really CHANGE from straight to gay...Maybe under hypnosis.

SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
GENDER: Male
TITLE: Scott

I do not know.The thought of being intimate with a woman is in my thoughts a lot. The female body is very attractive to me, the male body is not. Even though when younger I had a homosexual experience I attributed that to curiosity. I was drinking, very horny and was seduced, I was never penetrated. All that happened was that we were both hard together and he came on my stomach very fast. I can remember wanting to penetrate him but he was done. After that I always wondered if penetration was a normal sexual desire, hetero or homo, and I think it is.

SEXUALITY: Straight
GENDER: Male
TITLE: FPWearer

Even with homosexual relation in my pre-puberty and teen years I am now married and have a normal sexual relation. I believe sexual orientation is determined by blood.

somebody pleasured my cock older person when young, which encouraged my bisexuality. being pleasured sexualy by same sex when young can alter sexual prefference yes they can

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I think that people are born with a sexual preferance. I do not know if a person's sexual preference can be changed,however I do think that people's actions in terms of who they have sex with can be influanced by many factors, such as birth enviroment and life experiances. the only egzample I can give for birth is my own personal belief that all people areborn with a sexual preference. an egzample of the way someone's enviroment infulences their sexual preferance is most likely far more complex then I could ever explane, but I will atempt to give a brief sinario. If a person grows up in an atmosphear that potrays homosexuality as the worst thing that could posably hapen to a person then in many cases that person will have had no contact with other open homosexuals in a normal enviroment so they will grow up believeing they are heterosexual be it true or not. those that do think they are homosexual may deni it and may suffer sivear social and phicological problems.

I can't remember a time when I wasn't attracted to men. I believe it is genetic. I feel I was put on this earth to be with men. I was married once. The most awfull time I can remember. Not because there was any thing wrong with my wife. I just hated having sex with women.

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Curves. Heterosexuals are subconsciously fascinated by curves and most things round. Hence, the shape and form of the female body with all their parts cause a reaction in all males heero or homosexuals alike.

My sexual preference is caused by the same thing that causes my eye color... It is within my being. This can be the same as allergies. Do you choose to be allergic to something? No, you just are. Since I have only been me, I can't speak for other's sexual preference being caused by the same thing as mine. Deep down, we all know what our sexual orientation is. The perception that we give out to the world may be at odds with who we really are. I can change my sexual orientation for a small time period if there is enough cash yet it will always come back to me being more comfortable and sexually aroused by men.

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My sexuality was determined by the same factors that determined by all the things that make me uniquely me. I believe that our sexuality is determined at the time of conception and that we can not have an effect on someone elses sexuality.

My sexuality and preference was determined by my genes. I believe that gayness, bisexuality, and heterosexuality is determined by the genes that we inherit. We cant change our sexual orientation any more than we can change our size or eye color. No one can change the fact that I am a gay man. I firmly believe that I can not change anyone elses orientation

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I believe sexual preference isn't a choice, but, I believe in God, and there fore I believe that homosexuality and bisexuality is immoral and should not be encouraged. Please don't think I hate gay people, I have 2 friends that are gay, and they know my Point of view on the matter, but it doesn't mean that I force my opinion on them.

I was in my late 20's when a buddy and I were wresling. He pned me and started rubbing my penis through my genes. I resisted at first but soon found the pleasurable feelings too much and just relaxed with mixed feelings. He noticed that I no longer resisted so he opened my pants and pulled them down, then took my penis in his mouth. I had an orgasm with no delay and shot more cum than I had sense my first sexual experience. This session made me realize that I could enjoy sex with both sexes and have sense. Prior that time I had masterbated with a few friends but nothing further with males. He awakened a desire that I guess had always existed and one I still enjoy even though I am happily married for many years and have children and grand children.

JBo

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I came from a female dominate family, older sister and mother in control. Discovered masterbation first and girls next. As explained in another question in this survey, I found out by accident that I could be sexually attracted and enjoy sex with both sexes while wrestling with a friend. Until that time I did not know he was bi.

I feel we are born one way or the other. I was born gay, those who are not and say we can change do not know what they are talking about. They do not have the answers. I was indeed born gay.

I beleive we are all to a degree attracted to both men and women. I think if the right opportunites were to present themselves to any of us we have the ability to react to them, that could result in sex with a man if you are a man or female if you are a female. I think part of us is what society poo poos. Let's be honest if we had no risk of being disclosed would we have the fear of having same sex relationships.

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I believe we are all born as either gay or straight as a default but can change over time either through our experiences or by choice. I was born straight and have always had a strong sexual attraction to women. Over time I've gone from being very attracted to slim blonde women to prefering plump brunettes to mature women etc... but I had never had any attraction to men at all and I don't mean I repressed it, I mean it wasn't there before but by looking at pornography of transsexuals and slowly becoming more aroused by it over time, I begun to want to explore if I could enjoy sex with a proper man. The idea aroused me but I was never able for many years to find any images of men that were arousing in the same way as I had for women and transsexuals. I often came back to the subject and would look for gay pornography with men I found attractive and slowly I have become more attracted to men not just in pornography but in every day life. At the same time, I have begun to lose my interest in women. I don't mean I don't like women anymore but rather I prefer to think about men both romantically and sexually and am slowly becoming less restricted in the types of men I find attractive. I believe that I can and will become gay and that my heterosexual desires are subsiding more each day. I also believe that I can stop this transition if I want as it has only been by intentionally persisting in trying to be gay that I have come so far and been able to change my natural heterosexual tendancies. I wanted to share this experiance as I have read about gay people wanting to become straight but not the other way round. Am I the only straight person who wants to be gay?? Also, unusually, I have no gay friends at all though the friends I have confided in are supportive of me. I know many of you will wonder why I want to be gay and I can't really give an answer other than I want to experience love with people that I had never considered before and I know I'll regret it if I don't.

I'm 33 and my first gay thought was 5 years ago so it's been a long process but I'm convinced that becoming gay will be the best thing I've ever done. Finding a man to fall in love with has now become my greatest hope for the future. I hope my story helps someone else in my position to understand that they are not alone in wanting to change their sexuality for whatever reason!

Brian

I don't know. My guess is that sexual preferences are caused by genetics and environment. Gender preference is probably more genetic, but I think sexual practices and techniques are more likely determined by experiences and environment.

I think people are born with their preferences. Some get a chance to discover that they have options and others do not. I got to try bisexual stuff and discovered that I am straight. I did a lot of anal and oral (both giving and getting) when I was in school. It was way easier to find a horny guy or group of guys than to find one horny chick. Now, if someone asks at a party, sometimes I will do anal on a guy or let them suck me. Partly I am being polite but mostly it is that I when I am erect I will put my penis anywhere it is welcome. I say I am straight because I never have fantasies about guys or look at guys on the street the way I look at chicks.

I think what you are exposed to shapes your mind. I went to boarding school were everyone talked about wanting to screw girls but did homo things to relieve the pressure. No one had a choice. It was a tradition. Senior boys did what they wanted with junior boys. It was a way of being accepted. I am married and still want sex with guys. Most gay guys want to kiss. We never kissed at school. We sucked or pumped, no formalities. I don't feel right kissing a guy.

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I've always thought the human body, male and female, can both be attractive. Because I have quite an imagination, and having the libido that I do, I had sexual thoughts about both sexes. This had me confused through my teens and into my early adult life. I had only experimented through mutual masturbation with cousins and friends at a young age. But it was always about getting off. I was a horny teenager. When it comes to sex and relationships I think about women. I have fallen in love with women, (I am now married) I can imagine spending my life with her, growing old with her, having children with her. When my thoughts would turn to men, (which occasionally do) it was just about the physical aspect. Not love, or commitment or loyalty, just sex. It was always fantasy about my own sex and looking for someone to be a mirror image. I know what it feels like to cum and seeing another man cum, just showed how great sex feels. I think most men are created this way (they have the ability to look at both sexes and see how beautiful they are). Some men can show how they feel and not supress it, while others can't admit that God made two beutiful forms. Part of our make-up determines who we are going to love (with commitment and loyalty - and not just sex). Genetics tell us who we will have an emotional connection too.

I believe that sexual preference has no single cause. I feel there are different causes as each individual varies. I believe my sexual preference to be bisexual was caused from several factors. My mother was overprotective, and was more dominant than my father, who I feel was more like the average person. At an early age, I identified with her more, and even wanted to be a girl at one time. There were older girls in the neighborhood who would come over to our house and spend time with me. I really LOVED doing girl stuff, like playing with dolls, painting my toenals and fingernails like they did, and even playing a female role when we were playing. Needless to say, I was a pretty good girl! But then there were some boys who I was friends with as well. They came over and we played our usual boy games and all. But there was one type of playing that helped shape me into what I am today. I had sex the first time with a guy when I was 5 years old, believe it or not, with my 8 year old cousin. He introduced me to it, and I didn't even know what it was. Even though it was not so exciting, I did enjoy it and still don't regret doing it one bit. The next year, two other friends of mine were at the house, and asked me if I wanted to have sex. I agreed, and this was the start of many, many times we would have sex together. From age 6 to age 9, we had sex very regularly, and I enjoyed it very much. But what I didn't know was how sex was connected to romantic relationships with girls. I just thought that sex was what a bunch of guys did when they were together to have fun. When I was 10, another friend of mine explained to me how girls got pregnant. At first, I was really turned off with this. Doing this stuff was not a nice thing to do with a girl. My dad had always taught me to treat girls with respect, and to never talk dirty around them. Thinking of sex as being something dirty or not nice, I didn't go for things at first. It would not be until I went through puberty at the age of 12 that I would start to have sexual attractions for girls. From age 12 to 16, I was attracted EXCLUSIVELY to girls. But when I was 16, all of a sudden I started to notice guys in a sexual way as well. I didn't even want to feel this way, it just happened. I had heard all the things about gays and all, and had later found out that the sex acts my friends and I were doing were the same thing that gay people did. I still was attracted to girls, but was becoming increasingly attracted to guys as well. While in college, my attractions toward guys skyrocketed. I had a guilty complex because of this. At first, I thought this same sex attraction was a phase, but year after year, it never went away. Over time, I soon came around to accept these feelings, and after I was able to accept them, I felt better about myself than I ever did. Today, I'm bisexual and VERY proud of it. I feel that I have the advantage of being able to be attracted to BOTH girls and guys, and therefore have a larger pool of people to choose from. I would NEVER change even if I could. And I do not regret having sex with my male friends at a young age, as I feel they introduced me to something that no one else could ever do. I don't really think that someone can change their sexual orientation. I really think mine was set from the start, as I seem to have been half boy, half girl from as early as I can remember. Even though I'm mostly masculine, I still have that slight feminine side, and still like to hang out with women today!

there is no cut and dry answer to this question. if it were that easy then a lot of people would be out of a job. i do believe that one is born a certain way, nature but i do believe that nurture factors into the equation as well. i, personally, i am still trying to figure out what i am. i have had sex w/ both men and women, but i can't decide if it's because i am bisexual or simply not very choosy in who i have sex w/. either way, it's a loaded question w/ no definitive answer.

I believe its the persons choice to be gay, bisexual, or straight. I am 200% straight. I hate gay-metrosexuals... If you're gay im ok with that as long as you dont try and be matrosexual or try to recruit people. I dont have much to say about bisexuals but the being half-gay is kinda weird to me.

I guess sexuyal preference is genetic, probably for everyone. I do not think you can change your own or someone else's orientation.

I always though the only sex was with a woman.I was married about twenty years, when my wife had to go out of town. We have always had a good sex life(at least 3 times a week) so i neede to be satisfied and masturbation was not doing for me,I have to have a nother person to enjoy sex so I answared a ad for a exotic rub down by a male. It seemed a exciting thing to do,so I went and it was wunderful. I had never held a mans penis in my hand or mouth be for.I see him now about once a month we do and say things my wife would or cant do,but I still love her and have great sex with her.I cant see how any man would not want to have sex with a man.

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Its the old nature vs. nurture debate. I believe that your enviroment can greatly decide your preference.I live in a house with women and i never determined myself gay or bi but i think about men sometimes. My friends are always crazy over girls and me being a gentleman i dont act that way towards women. Dont get me wrong there are some girls in my school i find good looking. However i still look at the boys in my school to. So i believe that nuture has everything to do with it.

I am not 100% sure that we are born with our sexual preference, but that may be the case. Upbringing and circumstances may have a lot to do with it. I think most of us are bi to a certain degree, but of course I can only speak for myself. When I was quite young I thought I might be gay and actually went to far as to have a few homosexual experiences. I cannot say that I did not enjoy it, but at the same time did not find it fulfilling or very sexy. I just prefer sex with females and find it much more satisfying. I also masturbate a great deal and like that also. Everyone is different.

I'm not really sure what my sexual preference is, as I get turned on by both men and women. I think that in nature we are set up to be a certain sexuality, however through nurture we can change. For example, when I was quite young, me and one of my freinds, were playing around and ended up giving each other blow jobs and jerking each other off, and i think that this is one of the reasons why I am undecided.

1. I don't know. I'm gay since I can remember.

2. I don't really know. Maybe there are many ways to be straight or gay. Maybe it's only genetics, or nurture, or both. Who knows? And who cares?

3. There is not scientific evidence for that. But there is people that can say a lie under the pressure of religion's brainwashing, and then their lives become an unhappy lie too. Although all we are free to choice what to do with oneselves.

Many factors contribute to a person's sexuality - nature, nurture, relationships. It is too complex to be fully understood at this time, and I wonder if we can ever fully know what causes sexual preference. It's like trying to understand why some people have a deep craving for sugar, while others desire salt. The question is too complex, and is indeed different for every person.

As far as changing one's sexuality - I believe that no one can consciously change their own sexual preference, and certainly not someone else's sexual preference. Since the vast majority of gay people fight like crazy to not be gay before finally accepting their preference, if it were possible to change their sexuality most gay people would have done so to avoid a lifetime of rejection and struggle. Don't get me wrong - I now love the fact that I'm gay. But before I accepted my sexuality, I tried for a long time to change and I know many many people who have had the same experience.

I believe that sexuality can evolve throughout one's lifetime, and a person can find themselves attracted to people they once thought unattractive. But this is a complex and largely subconscious evolution, and not something that can be consciously controlled or shifted.

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Sexual preference is innate, and shouldn't be an issue in our society, and I don't believe anyone's sexual preference can be changed.

1) Like everything else, a mixture of nature and nurture 2) Probably not

I suspect it's biological, probably genetic, but possibly influenced by prenatal chemistry. If it were learned, it wouldn't be so persistent and universal. I've experimented with men more than once but have never found it to be nearly as intense as relations with women. Nor do I find men attractive and very rarely fantasize about gay sex. I've given it the old college try, but it seems I'm wired for girls.

I believe, like some here, that sexual orientation is something a person is already born with. I don't think it's possible to change whom you're attracted to. I also believe that to some degree, we are all attracted to both men and women and that if an opportunity arises for us to explore that attraction (either hetero or homo), then that's where we proceed. It is only then that AFTER that curiousity is satisfied that it becomes a choice whether we continue pursuing those of the same sex or opposite.

I was raised by a dominant mother, and my father was largely absent from my life. I am sexually attracted to females as I know how great sex is with them. However, I am more emotionally attracted to males, as I don't trust women over the long haul. Also, my father was uncircumcised, but my older step-brother was cut. After my dad was gone [divorce] my mom had me cut when I was in sixth grade, [she thought] so I wouldn't be embarrased in the locker room. However, by this time I had been traumatized by being uncircumcised for quite some time. I was happy to be cut at that time, but I had already experienced quite a few years of feeling different and inferior to other males [because I wasn't circumcised as they all seemed to be]. I think all of these issues contribute to my feelings of sexual confusion. I also feel that genetics are a part of it . . . though in my case, had I been circumcised at birth [as were the vast majority of my peers], and been brought up by two parents therefore having both a male and female role model, I have no real idea what my sexual orientation would be. I feel that my own situation is to a fairly high degree psychological but perhaps I would be bisexual anyway.

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Everyones cause for choosing their sexual preference is differant. Mine is mostly towards the same sex because I'm very sexually pleased being with another male. Not every guy attracted to another guy has this preference because he likes a hairy chest, legs, muscles, or cock and balls. Sometimes it's all about sex and giving or recieving with another of the same sex. I myself get turned on with having a cock and it doesn't have anything to do with me having one. I've also made my preference because I'm more of a male sub to other males and like to be attracted that way.(Like top or bottom) I don't believe anyone could change another person's preference unless they wanted it because they found out that they like it better that way. Everybody decides for themselves in the long run what they like!

There were two distinct ocurrences in my youth that made me by. One, a relative who was close to my age engaged me in mutual masturbation, and when I spent the night with a girlfriend when I was thirteen. My girlfriends uncle, who was in the miliatry, woke me up by sucking my dick and I had never felt anything so good. However, the softness of a womans ass and tits still drive me crazy and it is my preference.

My sexual preference is something very deep and immutable. Naked men are not a turn-on for me, whereas I get aroused immediately when I am with a woman in a sexual situation (even if there is no nudity involved). This is not to say I find men ugly in any way. I think the human body of both sexes is very odd and beautiful. Sexual preference likely has much more to do with someone's experience than their orientation. Having met many men who are gay, yet are married to one of the opposite sex and women in the same predicament, I think that people are much happier when their preference is also their orientation. If you are straight, bi, or gay, be proud and happy. What is most important is that you are caring lover.

It is my belief that some people are born who they are. Yet, it is also my belief that there are others that chose who they had become because of life experiences. I don't believe that there is one blanket answer that covers everyone's sexual preference. I think this is particularly so for bisexuals. I can be as easily aroused by an erect penis as I am a woman's vagina. For me it mostly depends upon the person with whom is the object of my focus, and the situation. I believe that it's possible that a person can change their own orientation, as well as having the ability to change another's sexual orientation. However, I believe it is easier to change another's sexual orientation than their own.

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I think genetics plays a huge role in our primary attraction, but I also think that we humans have the ability to expand our realm of attraction as we grow older. Society in general tends to pressure everyone to fit into neat categories, but we need not submit to this pressure. As I grew older and was exposed to a wide range of people and experiences, I discovered that I love both men and women, and can be sexually attracted to the whole spectrum of gender identification. It was only my societal conditioning that kept me from recognizing this. I'm attracted to certain human characteristics, not to biological characteristics associated with a particular gender. Actually, if I'm attracted to a person, the nature of the genitalia are not important to me. And, I don't give a rat's ass what the church or the guys at work think about this.

i have been gay since as long as i can remeber. i didnt choose to be gay or what not. it was something that i felt as a child and knew all along. i hate the fact that i am tabooed and called a sinner for being gay. i was born this way and i am happy of that fact.

I prefer man to man sex but have the same urges toward women. I enjoy performing orally on both sexes and have the same intensity of orgasms given by man or woman. Being bi-sexual was not born in me, just my longings to satisfy and be satisfied. Availibility of sex partners is more than doubled by being bi-sexual. I wouldn't change anything about my sexuality.

I am almost 18 and I am really confused, as I feel unattracted to either sex. At one stage I was sure I was gay, then I was sure I was straight. I think having unwated sexual experiences when I was very young with a man has stuffed up my sexuality altogether, as my true straight side is clashing with my past gay side, and I am hoping that it will sort itself out soon. Until then, I am happy just masturbating. ;)

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One must distinguish between sexual identity, sexual orientation and sexual behaviour. The first two are beyond one's control. The latter is within ou control. There are many theories about what causes sexual orientation. However the most accepted and plausable explanation is a combination of genetic and environmental factors. Some individuals are predisposed, genitically, to being homosexual and certain environmental factors can trigger off a genetic trait causing one to become homosexual.

I am sure that my sexual orientations caused by my childhood experience. My first rememberances are sexual ones. I use to masturbate since my ealy childhood. My mother masturbated me

As of late I am primarily turned on my men. Getting a hard reaming and sucking cock are my most powerful sexual desires, I'm not sure why I like playing the feminine role during sex, but I know I love it, and I don't believe I can ever change that..

I am 25 years old and strongly attracted to women. But, like a person in a previous answer somtimes look for bi pornography on the internet. This is because i worry that I may infact be bisexual or even gay. I know I was born straight as I always fancied girls. My first sexual experience was not a pleasent one and i ended up losing my erection. This worried me and this is probably why I started looking to test myself. I somtimes worry when im with my partner that I will lose my erection and then wonder why, again leading me on a search for a motive, i.e sexuality. I have found that whilst I begun looking at transexual / biporn i have eventualy started to like it and worry that my worst fear is true. After reading some of the above answers though I feel that I can do somthing about this. I have most likely tried so hard to convince myself that I am not gay / Bi that i have ended up believing that I am, or else I wouldnt be trying so hard to convince myself that I am not (if that makes sense) So I will lay this to rest right here and now, any one who may find themselves in a similar situation, stop testing your self enjoy women and accept that it is natural that when the penis is erect it will happily go wherever it is welcome.

Women make my cock ache. Men do nothing for me. I would like to watch my wife 69 another gal. I'll bet she be a great muff muncher. I've dreamed of a friend of her's eating her. Or her riding my cock, and her friend standing over us, with my girl eating her. I have no desire for her friend, but I'd like to see her make my gal cum. I don't particularly like her, I find her looks, curious at best. I get the feeling she is sexually oppressed and naive. I can't help but feel her and my wife would be explosive. I do admit I wouldn't mind cumming on her face. Especially if my stoke was at my wifes hand. I guess I wouldn't mind ass fucking her. I'd kinda like her to feel it. I doubt she'd ever try such a thing, she looks the missionary only type. But I'd bet a cock up her ass would be addicting. She has black Italian hair, I'd love to see it buried in my wife crotch. My wife would die if she knew I wrote this, lol.

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Without a doubt I was born gay. 110% Gay-Homosexual. I love and respect women - but I am emotionally attracted to other men. Always have been. My family members and neighbors all understood that I was That way, or more cruelly My mother says you're a faggot. Or What did you get for Christmas? More dolls? These comments were directed toward me at age five way back in 1958. Today I'm a six foot 225 lb successful man with a husband living in Massachusetts. It's in the genes...I took my pacifier up the poop shoot. Nobody made me this way. I once read a piece of graffitti written on a wall My mother made me a homosexual, underneath I wrote: If I bought her the yarn, would she make me one too?

Dan

Chemistry in my mother's womb caused my sexual orientation. I could no more change my chemistry than my eye colour. Take testosterone and I only turn more gay. Take antidepressants and I'm a calmer gay man. There never was any choice in the matter for me. I was hard wired this way from my beginning.

Dan

You are born with your sexually preference. I don't think there is a cause. If both men and women followed their gut feelings along with societies positive approval you would not be asking these questions.

I can remember a particular conversation that I had with a friend when I was younger, when we were probably only about five or six years old. He told me that he had accidently gone into the wrong changing rooms at the swimming pool and seen a naked woman, and I distinctly remember thinking that I wasn't really interested in naked ladies, and that I found the naked men in the male changing room more interesting. Obviously it didn't mean anything to me at the time, but looking back on it now, it seems to suggest (in my mind at least) that i've always had an attraction to other men, even before it was anything particularly sexual; this leads me to believe that if it's not a genetic matter, then my sexuality must have been set by the time I was very young. Although, I am also open to the idea that there is somesort of pre disposition which is further established by early life experience.

I was particularly troubled to read the suggestion that homosexuality is caused by child abuse. This certianly isn't the case for me. I grew up in a caring two parent family, and I am the oldest child of three (my brother and sister are both straight). I lost my virginity to a girl when I was 16, and tried until I was 19 to convince myself that I was straight. However, when I got to university I decided that there was no point in living the lie any longer, there was no way that I could possibly divert my innate attractions from men and onto women; I certainly don't believe that anyone has a choice in their sexuality.

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